You have been DOOM'ed
Every now and then, the average gamer's voice goes to Hollywood and their hopes and dreams of watching their favourite game into a movie would come true. Two of the successful titles that impressed their Audience were Mario Brothers and Mortal Kombat. Two of which didn't really have much of a storyline to begin with.
Then there was Resident Evil. The game which was full of mystery from the start. Okay. First movie was good. It answered a few unknown questions and added a few.
Then there was the farked up sequel. God knows why Hollywood bothered to make it. The storyline was butchered to the extent of changing the super-cool insedious juggernaut Nemesis into a brainless top-secret government project controlled by the PS2 controller.
You think, Hollywood my have suffered a lot of losses for this movie. But then again... Here comes DOOM.
The start of the Doom movie wasn't so bad. Just a little overview of what the Nevada desert may look like in the future. But the setup of this "Future Earth" was actually really bad. Some Black Dude was playing a game way way way outdated for the year 2046. Who the hell uses a box that big to play some later version of Space Invaders? Hell it's only 2005 and the PSP is 10 times smaller than that box.
There was a religious Marine who would cut crosses on himself each time he muttered the Lord's name in vain which was cool. Too bad he had to die first and all his religious reference just remained as a figure off speech.
The background of the Mars research fascility didn't even look like they were on Mars. It looked like they were on some kind of science museum of what "it would look like" if human kind settle on Mars. There wasn't even a Mars Sandstorm! Neil Armstrong could've pulled a better hoax than that.
There was a bunch of marines at the start that seemed like pansies if you compared to the marines that featured inside Doom and Quake. Even the "Doom Guy" seemed like he was having a gay relationship with "The Rock". There was even a kid who had the look of "what the hell am I doing in this movie" on his face. Do we ever see Noobs in Video games? Okay. Maybe some. But this marine corp just blows.
Throughout the whole progression of the movie, you would think, that this movie still can be saved. That there should be a part where all the monsters starts flooding out. But.... No.... All you get are stealh kills by the lowest creature inside the entire game- The Farking Imp. And they didn't even shoot fireballs! They just infected people using dicks from their mouth.
And when you hear that the UAC was actually conducting experiments, fine, it's following the game. But when they replaced "Thousand of Hellspawned Demons coming through the Warp Gate from another Dimension" with "Genetics Experiment gone wrong", they BUTCHERED THE FARKING MOVIE.
Of all the thousands of uniquely design hell demons from the game, they decided to put only Three. (Four if you include the zombies.) The Imp, the Hell Knight (Which pretty much is the evolved version of the imp) and the Pinky Demon. Where the hell is my Cyber Demon?
The boss fight turns out to be nothing more than a duel with "The Rock" himself. Yes, wrestling has invaded Doom folks. Fuck the cool oversized Cyber Demon with Rocket Launchers, it's been replace by muscular men in tights. This just says that people working in the industry are just fucking faggots.
Hollywood has managed to surprise their audience by butchering a game descibe as "Event Horizon on Steroids" into "Resident Evil: 50 years later". These producers can seriously fark off if they think they just take any game title, try to be creative, and get profit from it. They might as well make a Starcraft Movie where the entire Zerg was a genetic experiment and everything is not in space.
Or better yet, A Warcraft Movie without Orcs. Just humans.
Hollywood is just stupid. -_-
Then there was Resident Evil. The game which was full of mystery from the start. Okay. First movie was good. It answered a few unknown questions and added a few.
Then there was the farked up sequel. God knows why Hollywood bothered to make it. The storyline was butchered to the extent of changing the super-cool insedious juggernaut Nemesis into a brainless top-secret government project controlled by the PS2 controller.
You think, Hollywood my have suffered a lot of losses for this movie. But then again... Here comes DOOM.
The start of the Doom movie wasn't so bad. Just a little overview of what the Nevada desert may look like in the future. But the setup of this "Future Earth" was actually really bad. Some Black Dude was playing a game way way way outdated for the year 2046. Who the hell uses a box that big to play some later version of Space Invaders? Hell it's only 2005 and the PSP is 10 times smaller than that box.
There was a religious Marine who would cut crosses on himself each time he muttered the Lord's name in vain which was cool. Too bad he had to die first and all his religious reference just remained as a figure off speech.
The background of the Mars research fascility didn't even look like they were on Mars. It looked like they were on some kind of science museum of what "it would look like" if human kind settle on Mars. There wasn't even a Mars Sandstorm! Neil Armstrong could've pulled a better hoax than that.
There was a bunch of marines at the start that seemed like pansies if you compared to the marines that featured inside Doom and Quake. Even the "Doom Guy" seemed like he was having a gay relationship with "The Rock". There was even a kid who had the look of "what the hell am I doing in this movie" on his face. Do we ever see Noobs in Video games? Okay. Maybe some. But this marine corp just blows.
Throughout the whole progression of the movie, you would think, that this movie still can be saved. That there should be a part where all the monsters starts flooding out. But.... No.... All you get are stealh kills by the lowest creature inside the entire game- The Farking Imp. And they didn't even shoot fireballs! They just infected people using dicks from their mouth.
And when you hear that the UAC was actually conducting experiments, fine, it's following the game. But when they replaced "Thousand of Hellspawned Demons coming through the Warp Gate from another Dimension" with "Genetics Experiment gone wrong", they BUTCHERED THE FARKING MOVIE.
Of all the thousands of uniquely design hell demons from the game, they decided to put only Three. (Four if you include the zombies.) The Imp, the Hell Knight (Which pretty much is the evolved version of the imp) and the Pinky Demon. Where the hell is my Cyber Demon?
The boss fight turns out to be nothing more than a duel with "The Rock" himself. Yes, wrestling has invaded Doom folks. Fuck the cool oversized Cyber Demon with Rocket Launchers, it's been replace by muscular men in tights. This just says that people working in the industry are just fucking faggots.
Hollywood has managed to surprise their audience by butchering a game descibe as "Event Horizon on Steroids" into "Resident Evil: 50 years later". These producers can seriously fark off if they think they just take any game title, try to be creative, and get profit from it. They might as well make a Starcraft Movie where the entire Zerg was a genetic experiment and everything is not in space.
Or better yet, A Warcraft Movie without Orcs. Just humans.
Hollywood is just stupid. -_-
