Thursday, March 25, 2004

Survivor: Uniten, Day 4

Head feels like breaking to pieces. Hardly ever get to see anyone around here in Uniten. Seems like most of the people around have been casted out already. XD. Well, anyway, for once this whole semester I can actually walk across a building without saying Hi to someone I know. Which is kinda sad because pestering the company of others is to a certain extent my happiness. Needless to say, I do crazy things when I'm alone and sink into a wallow of depression. =(

Most of the time I've spent hear are studying and listening to fellas watch football. It's agonizing, sitting around being idle but I guess I can't complain since some fellas I know spend 1 whole year doing that same shit. (My sympathies. T_T)

Yet... Even when the holidays are here, will I ever achieve happiness? I've mentioned a lot of times I never regret spending a lot of quality time to myself and having free time to do whatever I want. But in the end, I'll most likely to achieve nothing.

Nothing really ever changes around here. Sure I could hang around with the buddies, but I still desire that feeling of rush, the feeling to know what it's like to live.

Bored and lonely here in Uniten. But not giving up.

Peace out.

I tried to gain my breath
And then I ran out of breath

Owww...... Hehe....
And then I ran out of breath....

Tuesday, March 23, 2004

Survivor: Uniten, Day 2

Reliving the moments of dorm life. Icy cold showers in the morning and ants in my pants. Staying inside with a couple of noisy friends of mine. Finals are near so it's time to cram it what you learnt or re-learn what the lecturer was saying or simply get the understanding of what the heck he or she was saying in the first place.

I hate finals. But don't everyone? =
Fortunately for me, I don't my exam subjects all crammed up in 2 days. Some of the students of my batch got a killer 4 subject paper in 2 days. (OMG) Not that I didn't escape that. One of those 2 days is are the papers I have to go through. >.< Staying here helps me catch up with a few friends (Terasa macam nak toceng! Dude, that fella is so twisted. >:) but helps me remenisce some of the bad memories of the past two years... (sigh). Otherwise, on normal hours, I seem to have too much free time in my hand. I listening to an old Offspring song with the title "I wanna be sedated". The song ain't really one of their best, but I was thinking that would make a nice title for a piece of artwork. I haven't really drawn a cover for my pencil box in almost a year. =\ Maybe I'll upload it.

Meantime, more glooming news.. =
"Kouk is a nice fella. Too bad I won't be seeing him anymore."

Whoops. I just remember that I shouldn't really reveal much here. So if you were the one who said that quotation, I guess your predicament came true in the end. Quite a some stories involving you-know-who and you-know-who-too. I'll comment on that later.

Want more bad news? It seems endless. T_T But I think I'll save it for tomorrow... Seems like a long day ahead.

hm... Title for a good piece of art... Maybe a good nickname too..

"Sedative Memories"
And then I ran out of breath....

Wednesday, March 17, 2004

Megalomaniac! Whatever the heck that means!

Today I woke up with 30 minutes left to bathe, put my clothes on and drive to class as usual. Only thing peculiar about this morning was that I had to do it all that while holding my neck up straight. For some strange reason, my entire body felt tired on what I should've called a normal day. Let's take a flashback shall we?

Zil is sleeping in his room. Nobody is at home at the moment so he could relish good sleep in golden silence.

*Phone rings*

Zil: hm.... Hello..?
Nazirah: Heizil, Ji here, do you want to go for the incubus concert?
Zil: Dunno... Might have test on that day...
Nazirah: The concert is today.
Zil: Oh.. Okay.. Save me one ticket then...
Nazirah: I'm giving you two tickets.
Zil: ...Huh? You don't want?
Nazirah: No. You can have it.
Zil:...Okay... Cool. Goodnight.

Zil goes back to lying on his bed, still have asleep. Then his eyes spring open.

Zil: Did she just gave me tickets to Incubus??

Woot. How nice of my cousin to give me tickets to Incubus! Got a feeling that she got into a fight with her boyfriend or something. Oh well, I guess it's my gain. Few minutes later, I rang Hamsa, who also had just woke up at that time, SMSed Annette, Put on a good shirt (You guys must be farking sick of that kebaya shirt) and a few minutes later we were already there in front of the Hartamas High School. (The space for parking queud up so badly that it reached up till there. All the cars were getting fined like nobodies business. I can see the police weilding lightsabers with all the cash they're going to get from this one.) I don't really recall most of the Incubus songs except Megalomaniac, but all I remember that I was jumping headbanging which caused the pain in my neck right now. Hadn't had this much pain since Tze had that office party with 6 player Playstation control and heavy metal music. Oh wait, that was more painful. Everyone was moshpitting. >.<

Some familiar faces was seen throughout. Our good friend Mr. T came charging to us half naked. Izzie, Karen, Nadia, to name a few old SMBBians, and some Uniten seniors as well. And some fellas who were screaming "I love you, I'm pregnant." Dunno where that came from.

Ask for the performance, OAG was good. Let's take a little quote from what they said.

"Oh c'mon. Why you guys are cheering so hard? We're only the Opening band"

That just puts Too Phat right at their place! XD OAG is one of the most respected bands around here. I got the feeling that the crowd wouldn't mind if they played a few extra songs. They sang a their most popular tracks, which are 60's TV, Beautiful and Slumber. I've asked once and I will ask again. Where weren't they playing at LP Concert? Oh well...

Incubus? I can't remember much. All I remember was Me jumping up and down headbanging, Mr. T half-naked dancing, Hamsa headbanging, Annette's bouncy hair, Michelle's butterfly tattoo, and me headbanging. No pixies were hurt in the process. Unfortunately. They're bassis was really good though. When he started soloing, I could feel the ground vibrating under me. >:)
Too bad they didn't play drive though... =(

Song of today?
Are you gonna be my girl - Jet
Self Esteem - Offspring
Closing Time - Semisonic
and of course... Megalomaniac - Incubus
And then I ran out of breath....

Monday, March 15, 2004

A little bit on Crap and Philosophy, but not both.

Stoning again in the labs for another Day of Joy. Just a little fact I thought I should mentiond that despite the all the rant I made yesterday, I'd like some of you to know that I have reached 170kph (That's right, a hundred and seventy kilometers per hour) on my Kelisa. ^^

Don't believe me? Well I got 3 witnesses to prove it. And the amazing part was that the airconditioning was ON. They can't be too sure whether it's a hundred and seventy though. Mainly because the speedometer of the car had only the capacity for 160kkph. Hehe...

Now for a little update for a Days of Depression.

Datuk (Or Gramps) like I've said, is currently under the worst condition. He's definitely not that young and he's the only Grandpa I have (My dad's Dad died when he was 16). For some reason, I find I can connect with him because it's like I can really tell what he wants. The reason is what he wants is usually what I want. (Hey, I mean it in a good way.) Doctors did tell him to lay off the sugar but I can't resist from making his face happy whenever I bring him a packet of cookies. Maybe sometimes adding a little kaya to them was a little too much but I know he did enjoy sweet stuff. (Despite Grandma's approval)

Here's the question that really ponders my mind;

If you know you only have a few days left, would you try to lengthen it and suffer so that you could be with your loved ones or would you try to enjoy the brief but thrilling up till the end?

Maybe thrilling isn't the right word... But I think you get the general idea. If I was given the choice in between those two, I would choose the latter.

"There is an equation that sums up the meaning of life and I want to find it" --Some brilliant guy from Tech TV.

As for my unequally brilliant perspective, Life is really short. You can really please everyone all the time. And you can't please yourself all the time either. You gotta realize that some goals can never be achieved by you but at the same time you should at least try and accomplish it. Most importantly, make sure you had a good time achieving it.

Me? The one thing I'd like to make sure before I die, is that I gotta make sure that I leave behind some kids (So they dominate the world instead of me. If I can't do it, the MiniMe's will. I got the feeling this was passed down from Grandpa on Dad's side. He was also a cheeky one.) Or maybe I'm just saying that because I believe part of our lives is based on Selfish Gene Theory (Read it up. I'm too lazy to type it out all here...)I guess the rest of them is the religion based stuff which will be proven someday. Maybe proven a little indirect or ways we cannot fathom. The rest of the thing I have to worry about now is to make sure that I got what it takes to raise them.

So Grandpa, I hope you accomplished what you wanted to achieve. So that you may find Eternal Peace for time to come.

"To every father, his son is his future. To every son, he's father is he's hero." -- Quote from Road to Perdition. Good Movie... Two thumbs up.

I think my Mom is more of a heroine than my Dad. But hey, I know I got my personality somewhere.
And then I ran out of breath....

Sunday, March 14, 2004

Sad Mad Lad Had A Bad...... Week.

A lot of pretty shitty stuff happened throughout this week especially involving my relationship with a certain person. What does she looks like? She's got a black top, wears silver, got some leather, glowing eyes, runs reasonably fast with good acceleration, and four hot wheels.

Yeah. Most of you guys know her already. She's my cute little pet car branded and named Kelisa . The most loyal girl who drives me to Uniten everyday. But lately, I've been getting into a lot of trouble with her lately.

First off let's talk about the fines. I remember Jin's Dad telling me "Nevermind lah, I can kau tim wan. Uncle know people in the senior department." when I stopped the car in front of the KLIA. And then I remember Jin telling me "Do you seriously believe my dad?". I feel so stupid. (Oh Crap...)

Makes matters worst, when I went to Megamall to pay off the fine, I came a little bit late and found the place closed, so I decided to buy myself some donuts and grape juice. Then guess what? The next day when I wanted to pay off the fine, I was looking for the fine ticket inside my wallet only to find a carefour resit for donuts and grape juice. (Oh Shit....)

Okay, that's one fine to be settled with. Let's talk about another fine within the campus itself. Usually, most people would park beside the food court where the parking is guarenteed. So with all the enjoyment and bliss, the Uniten administration decides to beef up the law enforcement. And yes, again. Another parking ticket. (Oh Fark...)

That ain't over. When I went over to the administration, it say that I haven't payed a fine which I SWEAR I paid the last time with the stupid b*tch clerk told me that they would deduct from my freakin account! Yeah. Now it's been raked to about RM40. Including the fine which I had, it piled to about RM60 (Oh God...)

Yeah. And guess what. I lost the that damn ticket too. (Oh Man....)

Oh... Now for the show stopper. A big dent on the my KELISA!!! >.<

For all the people who owns motorcycles out there, for the love of God PLEASE don't try to overtake me from the right especially when I hardly ever use the signals (I drive the highway a lot where people don't give nuts about signalling.) At least the fella on the motorcycle wasn't injured. But he's helmet fell off. Meaning if I went any faster, he could've run directly into the drivers seat... (Oh... I'm running out of words here...)

I see a lot of dark moody days up ahead with some of the things that may come... I've got finals around the corner... Atuk (Grampa for some of you people) health is declining to a state where he is paralyzed.... And at the end of the finals, I've put myself into a reluctant trip to Tioman.. but err... Some people might be reading this blog so I'll leave this part of the rant out.

There's also another person who's cute, smart and sexy I would like to mention about, but I guess I'll save that for another day...
And then I ran out of breath....