Wednesday, June 24, 2009

So Ends M.O.N.D.A.Y.

Wow. There was about millions of things I wish I could have said at this post from time to time, but when the opportunity arrives for me to actually write, nothing comes to mind. It has always been a challenge for me to describe the things I go through, because what you read here isn't exactly everything in detail, but a short sweet summary of things (or in some cases over-dramaticized.)

Eleven weeks whistled past by this year without a chance to blog (except to inform all you would-be gentlemen and ladies following me on the Perhentian Trip) due to an intense exposure to the working life. In a stroke of mixture between good luck and bad, I ended up in a reputable company PHNEH and learned many things besides just working ethics and politics. Some said I work more like a real worker rather than an intern, which is a good thing for them because I don't ask much too much questions and is a bad thing for me because I don't get much answers. In a sort of devious plan to earn their approval, I ended up learning more than I bargained for and was tossed the responsibilities of a real Engineer, which resulted in my increase of puffing smoke disorder and the ability to make my teeth sweat.

There was a sense of fear. A gripping feeling that puts a leash around your neck and forces you to obey the very first instruction that comes to you. And there was some wicked sense of freedom, being free from the usual everyday problems that plagued me and having other problems to deal with that actually concerns myself. And yet, the sense of fear was twistedly satisfying, not only because there was a sense of completion, but it was a more productive sense of fear rather than anxiety.

And then there was that great feeling of comradeship. The ability to developed a bond when you share a certain pressure or cigarette, and the interesting people you meet on your walk of life. The stories you share, the trust you earn, and the sadness knowing that despite the common interest you have, you were only here temporarily.

"And when the rain goes away, So will I."

And if that sounded really morbid, I'd probably say something like

"Sometimes, the most cheerful people I've met, are the ones with the biggest problems." -- Zil commenting on a cheerful friend of his, who suffers from A.D.D.

So okay, despite a shocking feedback from Lail (who was the greatest roommate I never had) that mentioned my blog is very depressing, I don't have that much larger than life problems. But I do try my best to be a cheerful as possible.

However, I believed that even though there was no real way for me to describe this experience I've been through (although I will cook up something for presentation day), I'd say the most thrilling experience is that there was a will of change, not just internal of me, but my surrounding as well. What hasn't changed is that on this walk of life, I still walk alone. (Which is a good thing because developing an office relationship is a taboo and bad thing because one of the girls here is cute.) And what hasn't change is that no matter how mediocre and normal any procedure can be, I can still come out of it with a story to tell.

"You're not a writer Zil. You're a storyteller."

After being stuck inside a continuous loop for what seemed like ages, it's nice to see what I would describe as the gears of time moving again to allow the change of things. Other would say the silver lining in the cloud, and some would say the bitter taste of hope.

To any other interns who are at the brink of ending their payload; Fight on brothers and sisters, the war is not over yet.
To my working friends; Be nice to your interns. They just might save your HTC phone from being stolen or offer you a cigarette.
To those still keeping in touch with me through my blog; Thanks. :D

As for the Bangsar Boyz, they're pretty much the same. If there was anything regarding WoW, I'd say Jin was right. Turns out, it wasn't really that worth it. But... I suppose I had to pay a debt of gratitude for the one who let me get sucked in in the first place.

Quote of the Day:

"There's only so much work you can do when you're tired.
After 3 of clock, we're tired."
And then I ran out of breath....